First Step.

Sometimes when I’m driving or relaxing or sitting at work, I write amazing and awesome blog posts. In my head though. Never pen to paper or keyboard to Word. And what frustrates me the most is that I’ll have this amazing story and when I finally get to typing it in… it’s all gone. I know for me personally writing is healing for me. But sometimes, when life gets crazy, the thought of actually writing tires me out. Then I get to a breaking point and write like my life depends on it and things start to become clear again. So why am I constantly putting off something so simple?

This weekend I’ve decided its time to just write. As much as I can. Whether it’s to vent, to make a statement, or to share a story about my life, I’m going to just write it down. Here specifically. And like I said in my last story, I have come to terms that I am not the blogger that will have all those amazing photos. I tried, and failed. But I did try. I think the camera on my phone breaking and being completely unable to “open” was my last straw.

Also things this blog will probably never be. A crafty, designer blog. Or even a fashionista blog. I don’t have a very fashionable wardrobe of clothes… If anything I like to call my style comfortable. I don’t need to get dressed up for work so I don’t focus on cute blazers, heels or curling my hair. And I’m ok with that. You probably won’t find any advice or tips or daily exercise plans here. I doubt I will ever run a marathon or do anything of the sort.

But what you will find is me. Trying to figure things out. Recapping moments in my life that have shaped me into the person I am today. A 25 year old (almost 26) that’s pretty broke. Who is finally learning it’s time to say no to certain things so that better things can happen. You’ll find I’m basically stumbling through life. I have a lot of good things going for me but a many times I have a hard time finding the positive. I seem to get stuck in finding the negative and sometimes I wonder if I like it. But I know I don’t want to be that way. I hope by writing here, for the world to see, I will be reminded of all the good things I do have and how much I have left to accomplish. I have noticed lately that, for lack of a better phrase, I haven’t stopped to smell the roses. I find myself just passing through life. Weeks have gone by and good intentions have passed but I haven’t actually accomplished things or even noticed the time has passed.

I feel lethargic about life a lot. I stay in bed a little too long too often. I think I’m content with literally doing nothing but then I have regret that I’ve wasted so much time. I joke that I don’t want to be a lifer in this area or this job or something… but I haven’t been actively doing things to change that. It’s time to change and get out of this rut. I know I’m missing out on great opportunities, even if it’s just getting coffee with a friend. I know with writing, I’ll be able to see things clearly and start to map out my next moves. And maybe along with writing more, the funny stories I know I have deep inside of me will be able to come out faster. And maybe I will evolve to become a different type of blogger.

But this is my first step, an easy one… just writing.

Honest, raw, uncategorized, sometimes boring, sometimes epic, random writing.